Lately it feels like terms such as “girl boss”, “lady boss” and “boss babe” have taken the world by storm. As a blogger focusing on the empowerment of women, I feel connected to these phrases. My (basically) “sister-in-law” just gave me a gorgeous light up sign for my birthday that says #GIRLBOSS and I absolutely love it! I feel like it speaks to my soul and encompasses who I aspire to be.#GirlBoss: A strong, goal-getting, bad-ass babe who isn't afraid to go after what she wants in life. Click To Tweet
To me, a girl boss is a strong, goal-getting, bad-ass babe who isn’t afraid to go after what she wants in life. She has aspirations and will do whatever it takes to meet her own expectations of herself. I finally feel like I’m in the process of perfecting my own girl boss mindset, and I want to share my process with you. I’m going to tell you how I went from feeling hopeless to feeling empowered just with a shift of mindset. I’m also going to share the main resources that have changed the way I look at life and entrepreneurship. Finally, I’ll tell you exactly what you can do to shift your mindset and become the ultimate girl boss!
From Hopelessness to Empowerment: My Complete Mindset Shift
Do you ever feel like giving up on something the first time you fail at it? Have you ever found yourself feeling like there’s no way you can succeed at something, no matter how much you love it? If you’re anything like me, your answer is probably yes. How did you respond when you felt that way? Did you allow yourself to quit, running away from the problem? Or did you push through the obstacles and make it out the other side?
For my entire life, I’ve always hated conflict of any kind. Whether it be with people, places, or activities that I felt stuck in, I always tried to avoid any conflict whenever possible. I would avoid necessary talks with friends who had upset me. I often quit when the going got tough in any classes at school or part-time jobs. If there was conflict involved, I was out of there.
Recently I’ve had a lot of epiphanies about how I became this person. If you want to hear my thoughts about why us millennials are “so entitled”, be sure to check out my previous post! I’ve thought a lot about the events that have led me to be so anxious all the time. I studied psychology in university and learned a lot about how both genetics and our environment are variables that interact with our mental health. Quite honestly, I’ve recently come to realize that a large majority of my anxiety triggers are environmental, because I’m not anxious all the time.
This led to my epiphany that I needed to change my mindset. How could I control my anxiety and its triggers? How could I stop myself from feeling hopeless and incapable of success? Funnily enough, my blog is the first thing in a long time that makes me feel driven and passionate, and I really want to turn this passion of mine into a living. But in order to do that, I need to have the strong girl boss mindset that I’m now in the process of forming.
Key Mindset Shifts
As someone who has entrepreneurial dreams but has suffered from anxiety, these are the key mindset shifts I’ve made that have made a world of a difference in how I manage my business and my lifestyle:
- Removing the aspect of fear. While fear does have an important purpose in our lives, individuals with anxiety often react with fear to things that don’t necessarily need it. Fear should be reserved for dangerous, threatening situations. Take fear out of conflict or failure. If you don’t go into a situation feeling fearful beforehand, you’ll have nothing to lose. In turn, you’ll be able to remain calm more easily and think more logically, therefore increasing your chances of success.
- Embracing failure. How many times have you heard the phrase “failure isn’t an option”? I’m going to guess so many times that it’s probably heavily ingrained in your lifestyle. Here’s the thing though. You’re going to fail 80% more times than you’re going to succeed in life, and there’s just no getting around it. If you embrace that and look to failures as learning opportunities to help yourself improve, you’re going to reach success. If you quit after failing once, you don’t even have a chance. To learn more, check out my post on Sweet Success Society about turning failure into a learning opportunity.
My Favourite Resources for the Aspiring Girl Boss
In my pursuit to shift into this girl boss mindset, I’ve sifted through tons of articles, podcasts, books, freebies, and other resources. The ones I’m going to recommend to you have not only helped me shift my mindset but have also inspired me to be a better blogger, influencer, and human. These are my absolute die-hard recommendations for anyone hoping to become a stronger, more empowered woman. They’re also incredible if you have entrepreneurial aspirations!
Ebook: Career in the Making by Krista Aoki
I (virtually) met Krista around March 2017 after commenting in a Facebook group looking for other bloggers in my niche (aka millennial lifestyle bloggers – comment below if that’s you, I’d love to check out your blog and possibly connect for a collab!). We launched our blogs around the same time, and I was always so fascinated by her ability to monetize her blog so quickly and efficiently (she made over $2000 in her first six months blogging as seen in her income reports, how insane is that?!). On top of that, she’s extremely down to earth and probably one of the sweetest people I’ve met through this blogging journey!
She now runs a website with her boyfriend Mike called Reroute Lifestyle, which is dedicated to helping goal-getters like us make money online, reroute our lifestyle, and become the CEO of our lives! There are tons of great resources on that website alone, but we NEED to talk about Career in the Making. I was so curious to know exactly how Krista managed to make all that money from blogging in such a short amount of time. How was she monetizing her blog? How was she promoting it? What was she doing differently that allowed her to make sales even with a small audience? Because I’ve been struggling with my own blog numbers and my monetization growth has been slow, I decided to purchase Career in the Making.In @KristaAoki's ebook Career in the Making, she dishes out her strategy to create value-packed content, monetize her blog, and promote with intention to really connect with her ideal audience. 10/10, highly recommend to a friend! Click To Tweet
Why Career in the Making is a Must-Read
You guys, I can’t even tell you how much this book changed my outlook on being a blogger and influencer. There’s even an entire chapter dedicated to changing your mindset, and it’s incredible. Krista tells all in this ebook, dishing out her strategy to create value-packed content, monetize using a number of different platforms, and promote with intention to connect with readers who are actually interested in her content. It’s both a little bit overwhelming and incredibly motivating. I’m not going to lie, I actually had my notebook beside me while reading it and jotted down notes that I’m now trying to implement into my own strategy. Also worth noting is that I stayed up until 2:00am reading it… it’s that good!
If you want to check out Career in the Making, use the code DAYNNA to receive 20% off!
Podcast: The Lively Show by Jess Lively
When I was working in an office during the summer, I always listened to podcasts. Having just left a music career, I needed a break from both making and listening to music. A podcast was the perfect solution because it gave me something interesting and productive to listen to while still being able to concentrate on the work I was doing in the office. While I have a few favourites, The Lively Show is one I would highly recommend for anyone who wants to shift into the girl boss mindset.
I’m going to be completely honest and say that some of her newer content isn’t as interesting to me personally, but the older episodes, especially the ones where she interviews other girl bosses, are life changing. It was while listening to her interview with Danielle Moss (co-founder of The Everygirl) that I really came to terms with the fact that entrepreneurial success doesn’t happen instantly. If you have an entrepreneurial dream and want to live a healthy, happy, positive lifestyle, The Lively Show is a must-listen!
Self-Help Books: Getting Past No and Getting to Yes
My boyfriend Mike actually lent these books to me, as he had to read them while studying mediation at college. As I said earlier, I’ve always struggled with conflict resolution, and negotiating is a huge part of that. They teach you the exact techniques, mindset shifts, and strategies to take in order to have complete control in a negotiation. Since reading both of these books, I’ve learned to easily navigate challenging confrontations in a calm and collected manner. In turn, I’ve become much more confident in my ability to handle difficult situations. If you’re interested, I highly recommend checking out Getting Past No and Getting to Yes.
How You Can Shift Your Mindset to Girl Boss Mode
We’ve talked a lot about me and my favourite things in this post, but now it’s time to talk about you. I’ve told you how I made the shift to a girl boss mindset, but how can you do the same? Let’s break it down into steps.
1. Figure Out Your Triggers and Why They Trigger You
Do you often feel anxious? What is it that makes you anxious? Do you feel discouraged every time something goes wrong? Why do you think that is? Asking yourself the tough questions will allow you to really dig deep into some serious self-discovery. You’ll learn a lot about yourself in the process and will have a better understanding of why you react the way you do to different situations. This self-discovery phase will take some time and a lot of effort, so don’t allow yourself to get discouraged if you don’t have all the answers right away. Keep working at it, and eventually something will click. It took about a year of self-discovery before I finally had a breakthrough moment. After this, it’s actually pretty smooth sailing once you understand the background behind your motivations.Be willing to ask yourself the tough questions. Doing so will allow you to better understand why you behave and react in different ways. Self-discovery is absolutely essential to self-growth! Click To Tweet
2. Identify What Needs to Change
Once you understand the problems, you need to come up with a solution. This is true in every problem ever faced on earth. Breaking down the details of what you can control and what you need to change will help you come up with a plan so much more easily. Then, you can take action towards changes in mindset to help you live a more positive, healthy lifestyle.
3. Practice What You Preach
So you’ve taken the actions towards changing your mindset and you’re starting to see results. That’s a great start, but it doesn’t stop there! Keep practicing these mindset shifts in everyday life. The more you put them to use, the more solidified they’ll be in your natural behaviour. This is what I’m working on now. It can be so easy to slip back into old habits, but don’t allow yourself to. Instead, look at all the positive that will come from permanently shifting into girl boss mindset and removing negative reactions and behaviours from your vocabulary completely!
Being a girl boss is so much more than just a title or a phrase. It’s a way of being. It’s a mindset. And with it, you can conquer so much more in life. No matter where you’re at or what stage of life you’re in, the girl boss mindset can help you achieve so much more success and authentic joy than you may have thought possible for yourself. You just need to put in the time and effort to make it happen for yourself. And really, what’s better to invest in than yourself? You deserve it!
What is your biggest obstacle you struggle with in your current mindset? Let me know in the comments, I would love to help you get past it!
For more articles like this one, check these out:
- How to Cope with Destructive Criticism as an Entrepreneur
- The Top 10 Blogs Every Millennial Woman Needs to Read
- Dear Past Self: An Open Letter to My Past Self
Also, be sure to get your free girl boss mindset worksheet from the free resource library!