Hi, I’m Daynna. I’m 23 years old, I’m in a long-term relationship, and I still live at home. “Wow, how very millennial of you”, you might be thinking. As it turns out, approximately 1 in 3 North American 20-somethings live at home with their parents. If you think about it, that’s an insanely high number when compared to past generations. Why? There are probably a few reasons for this spike, but I’m just going to throw it out there that it probably has something to do with the cost-of-living these days. Just saying.
As a millennial woman still living at home, I can tell you that it’s a bit of a rollercoaster. There are great things as well as not-so-great things about it. My plan is to move out come September 2018, but we’ll get into that.
Why Do I Still Technically Live at Home?
This is actually a really good question. My personal choice to live at home is primarily a financial one. I know how to live away from home – I did it for four years while at university. I know how to cook and clean. Generally I’m pretty good at taking care of myself. None of that is an issue.
The problem I’ve been facing is with money. This past year, I began paying off my student loans. Because I went back to school this year, I unfortunately accumulated a little bit more (as in a semester’s worth). When will I have my loans paid off? I would love to do it over the next five years, but that’s going to depend on how well my business does. When will my business start to make money? This is a lot of the reason why I’m going all out on my business now while I don’t have too many financial responsibilities.
The cost of renting a decent one-bedroom apartment in any habitable area is also a lot for one person. “Okay, so why don’t you just get roommates then?” You may or may not know this about me, but I’ve had some absolutely terrible experiences with roommates. I could tell you actual horror stories about some of them, but I don’t want to scare you if you’re someone who has or will have a roommate. Not all of them are like that, sure, but my own experiences have shown me that I’m just not someone who does well with roommates. Maybe I’m part of the problem in those situations – I probably am, but that doesn’t change the fact that I’ve sworn to never do the roommate thing again.
What’s My Plan for When I Move Out?
As I mentioned earlier, my plan is to move out in September 2018. My boyfriend may or may not be going to school at that point. If he does, I’m going with him to whatever city he ends up in! That’s the ideal situation, and that will be the easiest way of going about moving out. If he doesn’t go to school, my plan is still to move out in September 2018. Where I’ll go, I’m not sure yet. Will it be with my boyfriend, I’m not sure (hopefully). Either way, that’s my goal and I’ll do whatever I need to in order to accomplish it!
The Advantages of Living at Home in Your 20s
I’m definitely not saying that living at home in your 20s is all bad! There are some major advantages to it. I’m sure the obvious one is the financial freedom that goes along with it. Obviously I’m not having to worry about paying monthly rent, which is great! On top of that, I also have dogs who I absolutely adore, so it’s nice to be able to spend a lot of time with them. Family homes tend to be quite comfortable, so it’s nice to not have to worry about socializing with roommates every time I leave my room. Also, when you’re sick, your parents are there to take care of you and make you tea and chicken noodle soup, so that’s an added bonus lol. It’s not all bad!
The Disadvantages of Living at Home in Your 20s
So here’s my biggest thing, and this isn’t a jab at my parents or anything like that. In fact, they’ve actually been very respectful about this for the most part – I think it’s more of a personal feeling than anything. Because I’m living at home, I don’t feel like I have the freedom that I would if I were living on my own. When I was at university, I did my own thing all the time and didn’t really have to worry about how it affected anyone else. Even though I have a lot of freedom (I spend every weekend at my boyfriend’s house for goodness sake!), I sometimes feel within my heart that I’m still obligated to do what my parents want when they want it – which I know logically isn’t the case. I’m a grown-ass woman, so I have no idea why I feel like this or if everyone feels like this when living at home in their 20s. Maybe I’m just being a people pleaser, but that feeling is the one major thing I’m looking forward to leaving behind when I move out.
At the end of the day, there’s positives and negatives to every situation. Obviously I would love to be living with my boyfriend right now and that’s what ideally will happen in September. Currently it’s just not feasible for me to live on my own, so I’m making the most out of living at home – and it really isn’t that bad! I feel like there’s always been so much shame on living at home in your 20s and I’m actually glad that it’s becoming more common. Most of us aren’t out of school until at least 22 if not later. The cost of real estate is absolutely absurd. I see no reason why there should be any shame put on someone still living at home in their 20s. If you’re working hard to get to where you want to be, then all the power to you!
Answer this: Do/did you still live at home in your 20s? What are/were your experiences with it? Let me know in the comments! Also be sure to join the dream team for exclusive access to weekly newsletters and the free resource library!