Dear best friend of the past:
You probably think it’s pretty weird that I’m writing to you, especially after all these years. It may seem completely random, but I assure you it’s not. Although we’re no longer an active part of each other’s lives, I still think about you a lot. I think about the memories we shared together – the good, the bad, and the hilarious. I wonder what you’re like now, and whether we would still be friends if I hadn’t done what I did. It still haunts me to this day.
When I was 16, I didn’t really know how to communicate my feelings in a healthy way. I was hurt because you were more interested in being popular than you were in maintaining our practically lifelong friendship. Countless weekends went by where you would go to parties that the “cool kids” in town were hosting. You did this without a second thought about inviting me, and pretty soon those new friends of yours replaced me. That’s when I decided to cut you out of my life all together. No explanation, no discussion, nothing. Our friendship was severed without a second thought.
I want you to know that the way I handled things was wrong. I could have talked to you about how I was feeling, and I should have. But when you’re 16 and completely self-absorbed, you don’t think these things through clearly. It was all about me at that age, and I didn’t take your feelings into consideration. I’m not really sure what your reaction was when I cut ties, but I can only hope that I didn’t cause you too much pain.
Despite all that’s happened, I want to tell you that I think back on our friendship in an incredibly positive light. You were such a major part of my life growing up, and I wouldn’t be the person I am today without you. I learned so many valuable lessons through our time together, such as the value behind close friendship. When I tell stories about our memories to people in my life today, I still find myself introducing you as “my friend”. Looking back on memories with you warms my soul, and I think I’ll always think of you as a friend.
I always wonder what things would be like had I not just cut you out of my life. Would we still be close friends? Would we have just naturally grown apart or lost touch? I wonder if we would even get along if we were ever to reconnect. We really don’t know each other anymore at this point. I know that I’m not the same person I was at 16, so I’m sure you’re not either. There’s no way to tell what would have happened, but that doesn’t stop me from wondering.
You have to know that I wish nothing but the best for you. I genuinely hope that life has treated you well and that you’re finding success doing something that you love! You always have been and always will be important to me, whether we’re in each other’s lives or not. If you were to call me up today because you needed something, I would be there for you in a heartbeat. I hope that you’re surrounded by people who love and support you and you’re able to reciprocate that towards them. Hopefully you still have that incredible sense of humour that brings joy to everyone around you. Finally, I really hope that you’re happy and doing well!
Take care of yourself. Find joy in the little things and love yourself. After all, you’re one of the best people I’ve ever met. I have no doubt that you’ll be successful at whatever venture you take. Just believe in yourself, and know that I’m cheering you on from afar.